Meaningless - vs - meaningful

My anti-valentine celebration of the previous night was cheerful and grand as expected it did however end with my good self loosing a day from my life. I felt awful to the power of awful. Maybe rightly so!

Somewhere there during the night's extravaganza I got suddenly hit by a deep thought on a meaning of my actions and existence. That is not an easy discourse when one's sober so just imagine my poor drunk brain struggling. So I ran to my friends - all the way on the other side of a table- and I cried 'Please help. Don't let me do anything stupid.'
'Who do you want to sleep with now?
'***.'
'Do you really want to?'
'No, but I will because I can.'
'Is it worth it?'
'No. It's a meaningless thing. But lacking meaningful someone what else is there left to do?'
And so it went on and on for a while. I believe that I tried to kiss every single one of my girl-friends present in a pub trying to prove the point of the above conversation (how?, don't ask me, that's beyond my comprehension). Eventually I kissed no-one, I went home on my own and twisted with pain as the day was passing by I had my little catharsis and I decided to act like a more meaningful person.

Don't get me wrong, I am a very meaningful person. I have a heart of gold and a wise mind. I perceive life realistically though at the same time I demand virtues and honourable behaviour of myself and yourselves. Every now and again, however, I do stupid things, meaningless things. I have my explanation and justification - I can do it, it keeps me in a loop, sometimes I need to do a meaningless nothing to get over a broken meaningful something etc. But what if by acting carelessly I miss on something special? As my friend said, what if a girl that could mean more is going to walk by seeing me doing sweet nothing with people I don't care about? Now, that's something to consider.

And therefore here I make a solemn promise of quitting booze and girls for a fortnight.
For I shall strive for more of a meaningful and less of a meaningless in this beautiful year of 2013.